A biologist, chemist, and statistician go hunting. The biologist shoots and misses to the left. The chemist misses to the right. The statistician shouts, “We got him!”
Dreadful pun of the day: An American tourist in Italy was constipated for a week, but when he arrived in Florence, the water was better and his condition went away. “With Firenze like this,” he said, “who needs enemas?”
Dreadful mathematical joke of the day:
Q: Why did the chicken cross the Moebius strip?
A: To get to the same side!
Dreadful elderly joke of the day: Two residents in a retirement community are getting it on when the woman stops and says to the old man,”I think I ought to warn you that I’ve got acute angina.”
The old man looks at her and says:”Yeah, and your tits aren’t bad either.”
Dreadful pun of the day: My dog got kicked out of her
poetry group. Apparently her bark ode didn’t scan.
An ancient Roman walks into a bar and says to the bartender, “I’d like a Martinus.”
“You mean a martini?” asks the bartender,
The Roman shakes his head. “Look, pal, when I want a double, I’ll ask for it.”
Pavlov is enjoying a drink in the bar. The phone rings. He jumps up and shouts: “Hell, I forgot to feed the dog!”
Dyslexia cost me my job in IT.
Turns out my boss wanted me to unzip his ‘files’.
Dreadful holiday baked goods joke of the day: I bought some delicious German Christmas cake yesterday, but it was stollen this morning.
Dreadful music joke of the day: An E-flat, a G-flat, and a B-flat
walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve minors.”