So Snooki of Jersey Shore fame has just signed a book contract — and is, yes, writing a novel. We want to address the naysayers who feel she isn’t quite in the Tolstoy club. Nonsense, say we. Snooki is highly qualified to be a writer. Just look at the following quotes from the debut novelist’s mouth (or keyboard).
Snooki is . . .
- a lover of words!
“Word of the day: sympathetic. That’s a big word. “
- verbally creative!
“It’s just a big ball of f*ckness. That’s a new word: f*ckness.”
- grammatically refreshing!
“Pickles is my thing.”
- unbound by conventional spelling rules!
“I feel like the dj is my body guard, you see the way he keeps me safe with that treble in that base, I feel free ” (via Twitter)
- an avid reader!
“I have mind blowing news! I am officially reading my first bo! Lmao! Nicholas Sparks “dear John!” … I‛m proud of myself!” (via Twitter)
- politically aware!
“I don’t go tanning tanning anymore because Obama put a 10% tax on tanning. I feel like he did that intentionally for us, like McCain would never put a 10% tax on tanning.. because he is pale and he would probably wanna be tanned.”
- prone to historical similes!
“I feel like a pilgrim from the f*cking ’20s washing this sh*t in the sink.”
- highly philosophical!
“. . . [I] don’t eat lobster or anything like that cause they’re alive when you kill it.”
- willing to share her deepest emotions!
“I thought I broke my vagina bone.. it was terrible.”
- unafraid of descriptive adjectives!
“You’re a f*cking white rat and you’re f*cking pale and you’re nasty.”